Reframing and the Transformation of Meaning

I tend to read a lot of books. Typically, I’ll read 2 or 3 at a time to give myself a little variety, like changing the channels on a TV. One will be a book I’ve chosen for entertainment, and another will be one on how to improve myself or help my clientele out. Passing over this section in Introducing NLP: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People by Joseph O’Connor & John Seymour, I felt it was something that would be appropriate to share with you on I Will Act Now. The following is a word for word excerpt. See how it can apply to you, in any and every aspect of your life:

Reframing and the Transformation of Meaning

"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."

- William Shakespeare

Mankind has always searched for meaning. Events happen, but until we give them meaning, elate them to the rest of our life, and evaluate the possible consequences, they are not important. We learn what things mean from our culture and individual upbringing. To ancient peoples, astrological phenomena had great meaning: comets were portents of change, and the relationship of the stars and planets influenced individual destinies. Now scientists do not take eclipse and comets personally. They are beautiful to see and confirm the universe still obeys the laws we have made up for it.

What does a rainstorm mean? Bad news if you are out in the open without a raincoat. Good news if you are a farmer and there has been a drought. Bad news if you are the organizer of an open-air party.

Good news if your cricket team is close to defeat and the match is called off. The meaning of any event depends on the frame you put it in. When you change the frame, you also change the meaning. When the meaning changes so do your responses and behaviour. The ability to reframe events gives greater freedom and choice.

One person we knew well fell and injured his knee quite badly. This was painful, and meant he could not play squash, a game he enjoyed very much. He framed the accident as an opportunity rather than a limitation, consulted a number of doctors and physiotherapists, and found out how the muscles and ligaments of the knee worked. Fortunately, he did not need surgery. He devised an exercise programme for himself and six months later his knee was stronger than it had been, and he was fitter and healthier too. He corrected the postural habits that had led to his knee becoming weak in the first place. Even his squash improved. Hurting his knee was very useful. Misfortune is a point of view.

Metaphors are reframing devices. They say in effect “This could mean that…” Fairy tales are beautiful examples of reframes. What seems to be unlucky turns out to be helpful. An ugly duckling is a young swan. A curse is really a blessing in disguise. A frog can be a prince. And if whatever you touch turns to gold, you are in big trouble.

Inventors make reframes. There is the well-known example of the man who woke up one night with the sharp end of a rusty spring in his old mattress digging into him. What possible use could an old bedspring have? (Besides depriving him of sleep.) He reframed it as a stylish egg-cup and started a successful company on the strength of the idea.

Jokes are reframes. Nearly all jokes start by setting events in a certain frame and then suddenly and drastically changing it. Jokes involve taking an object or situation and putting it suddenly in a different context, or suddenly giving it another meaning.

Sleight of Mouth Patterns

Here are some examples of different viewpoints on the same statement:

“My job is going badly and I feel depressed.”

Generalize: Perhaps you’re feeling down generally, but your job is OK.

Apply to self: Maybe you are making yourself depressed by thinking that.

Elicit values or criteria: What is important about your job that makes you think is going wrong?

Positive outcome: It could make you work harder to get over this particular problem.

Change outcome: Perhaps you need to change jobs.

Setting a further outcome: Can you learn something useful from the way your job is going at the moment?

Tell a metaphor: It’s a bit like learning to walk…

Redefine: Your depression might mean you are feeling angry because your job is making unreasonable demands on you.

Step down: Which particular parts of your job are going badly?

Step up: How are things generally?

Counter examples: Has your work ever gone badly without you being depressed?

Positive intention: That shows you care about your job.

Time frame: It’s a phase, it will pass.

Reframing is not a way of looking at the world through rose-coloured spectacles, so that everything is “really” good. Problems will not vanish of their own accord, they still have to be worked through, but the more ways you have of looking at them, the easier they are to solve.

Reframe to see the possible gain, and represent an experience in ways that support your own outcomes and those you share with others. You are not free to choose when you see yourself pushed by forced beyond your control. Reframe so you have some time to maneuver.

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